Breanna, turning 9 in December, was recently diagnosed with ADHD.
Breanna is a complicated soul. She’s emotional, stubborn, and damn it does she love to talk. I mean she’s trying to have life altering conversations before my first cup of coffee!
But she is brilliant!
Her attitude about life and learning is just unreal in comparison of where I was at her age.I am continuously proud of her.
…but I am annoyed to death by her sometimes.
And I don’t feel guilty for it either, because I’m human and I get annoyed. There’s no difference between my annoyance for her and my annoyance toward my husband. Except I can use actual cuss words when he frustrates me.
So to learn more about this diagnosis and to help her push forward in life, we go to her Doctor about every month. We discuss how Breanna is doing in school, how she gets along with her peers and how we all get along at home. It’s really a great time to evaluate her current prescription and a great time to suggest new ways to overcome daily obstacles. I love seeing how attentive the Doctors are to her needs. But…
Today I realized that I am not actually going to these appointments for her. I am going to these appointments for me.
These appointments aren’t about ‘fixing’ Breanna’s differences. These conversations and follow-ups are actually about teaching me more about my daughter. It’s like Parent/Kid therapy. And it’s wonderful. I always leave the office with a little more understanding of why Breanna is, well, Breanna.
I am finding myself more interested in hearing her 1,000 stories, because I am starting to realize how articulate and animated she is. I am becoming less frustrated with her stubbornness and I am realizing that she is a fighter for what she believes in. I am most surprisingly learning that her emotional side, although overwhelming, contributes to how deeply empathetic she is of others.
I am finally stepping back and really working towards helping my daughter. But not by trying to ‘fix’ her, but by trying to understand her.
So we will continue down this path for however long is needed.
Honestly, I probably should’ve seen a therapist a long time ago… but that’s a different story
Below I am including the stuff we are working on after this last meeting with the Doc.
The Doctor’s Orders
This month we are trying a few new things, per the Doctors orders.
We are going to give Breanna a little freedom when it comes to her bedtime hour. She tends to stay up late past her current set bed time, but is the first one to get up. So we are going to monitor her natural sleep patterns without the stress of trying to force her to sleep.
We are also going to discuss a few things with her Teacher on Conference day. Side note: Breanna will be taking a test designed to figure out if she is, in fact, Gifted after discovering she is advanced, therefore may be experiencing issues in school.
And, for my prescription. I will be keeping track of Breanna’s behavior at school and home, so that I can figure out how to better understand her daily life. (Which I think is a good idea for any parent, I will also be watching my two other girls and how they are coping.)
That’s it for today.
Stay tuned to see what works for us and what doesn’t. If you have any experience with ADHD, or Gifted children, I would love some helpful advice.